If you are an aspiring initiate into the drug trade, boy-oh-boy, do we have the hotel for you!

Looking to break (bad) into meth production? Each hotel room sports its own stove with the fire detector already removed for your convenience. Running for a position in drug transportation? We are right across the street from the docks on the Gulf of Mexico and a cheap location to wait for that late-night shipment. Where to hide the goods once they are in your hands? Why, perhaps you need to go to the bathroom? No, you really need to go to the bathroom. The toilet roll holder comes out easily, exposing a goodly gap between the walls.

Sorry dude who had specifically asked for room 104, I understand how quick and easy it would be to load up cars with the stored product and leave through any of the hotel’s multiple access roads, but we really wanted to be as close to the wifi router as possible. How else are we supposed to watch “Better Call Saul” and pretend to have an understanding of the drug trade?

Lexi lives in a truck camper down by the river.


post a comment